I agree wholeheartedly! We do need to do a better job of keeping fatherhood at the forefront of any conversation about family. It's important! I find it ridiculous that anyone could argue that fatherhood is somehow optional.

Happy Fathers Day to all cascade patch dads and my kid's doctor- Dr. Poe!

Thanks, Andrea! I will tell him about your positive post. And, Happy Father's Day!!

I'm not sure why anyone would have a problem with the Presidents' statement. There has been research and studies that indicate that a two parent household is better for children in many areas. But, people are free to have children outside of marriage, it's not somthing that can be mandated, people have a choice. But, I do think more people support marriage and raising a child in a two parent household. I belive that a single parent (male or female) can raise a child successful. There are a lot of variables to consider. I think we should be focusing and spotlight those who are successful at raising children regardless of their marital status. If we always focus on our differences it just keeps us pulling at each other. Let applaud all those that get the job done, whether it be in a traditional 2 parent home, a non-traditional 2 parent home or in a single parent home.

Re "people are free to have children outside of marriage" from Artis.
First, thanks for sharing your view in a calm, classy way! I have to say I respect it but I don't agree with it.
I didn't include statistics in my column because of time constraints but I do know that the communities with the largest percentage of two-parent households have the highest success rates in a range of areas (education of children, net worth, next-generation marriage rates, even health and fitness levels). I have lived in majority white and majority black neighborhoods and I know, without question, this is true.
Again, I think we are "too easy" on ourselves and accept lower standards because we don't want to offend anyone.
But I don't think it is direct attack on anyone to say that 2- parent households are the backbone of a strong community.
I think we all know people are free to have children outside of marriage but that does not mean it's a good thing. I think the root of many of our problems today—the high prison population, our high unemployment rate, teenage pregnancy, drug pushers and truancy and so much more—are tied to the breakdown of our family structure.
We just don't want to admit it (or, somehow, can't).
I agree with President Obama that the family foundation is something we need to to appreciate more and try and move towards in order to improve conditions in black America.

Amen, Amen, Amen!!! Daddy, your children need you to be just that... a Daddy. "Any male can father a child. It takes a real man to be a Daddy." --author unknown

Steve Sherwood, Sr.

I'm Denene Millner, editor of MyBrownBaby and the author of the piece you mentioned. Thanks for the inclusion, but I want to be very clear that I'm not outraged about the conversations and efforts to get black men to be accountable to their kids. This couldn't be further from the truth. I know folk are hurting; though I have not personally had to deal with fatherlessness, it does affect me in many ways—personally and professionally. What gets me worked up is a) the assumption that I have no right to participate in a conversation that speaks specifically to the plight of my people in general and people close to me in particular, and b) that the pain of those who grew up without fathers in their lives should drown out all discussion and compassion for the fathers who have and are doing the right thing—particularly on a day that is meant to honor fathers. (We should also remember that Father's Day speech came just as then-candidate Obama was pounded with the Jeremiah Wright fiasco; to me and a lot of others, it felt like he was throwing black men under the bus on Father's Day to score political points with whites who thought he was a black nationalist radical. We, as a community, should have been disgusted by this.) I'm a firm believer that the moment we drown out the myriad of stories in our community and embrace just one storyline, then we contribute to the stereotyping of our ENTIRE community, and I refuse to participate in that. Let good fathers have their one day.

Not sure if it beds to be said, but mankind should always strive to excel and be better. Period.

But it is clear, what is being said is that some folks aren't doing a good job now..

Denene,
Thanks for visiting us here and your great work on www.mybrownbaby.com.

Thanks Janita more people should bring light to this issue. It's amazing that a lot of people don't know what is happening with our black children. THEY HAVE NO FATHER.

President Obama is just speaking on what is true. I am so disgusted by the lack of fathers in Black homes and the fact that Black women have accepted it as the norm. The Black community should be called out. Everyone wants President Obama to be speaking about Black issues, but when he does here comes Black women tying to make excuses for thier missing Black men. What better time to say it then now. We got to do better.

I don't have a problem with so much with what the President has said.But at the same time I do have a problem that so many black women are too busy with the ghost of the past. That many do not allow black man 2 b in the home for the children. The system does too much to not allow black man to be in the home for their children or a part of their child's life. When you have that working against you and sisters working against you it creates a buffer that does not work. It is the child is the one who ultimately suffers. so we have a broken system judicially coupled with sisters living with past gohst who in affect create this absence of a black man from being in the home. Lord knows I have tried to be a part of my children lives. but when a mother moves constantly from state to state to keep the father from being a part of their child's life what is a man suppose to do. Or in my case when a mother brings another man into the picture and deceives him into becoming the adopted parent. Then I being a father of the child is left on the outside looking in when I know nothing about the adoption. It's a broken system that strips the father of any rights to their child. So I can't speak for of all of the fathers missing from the home but I can speak for myself and I wanted to be part of my childs life.

Obama has the right to be mad... I'm a single black mother of one an I have to raise my SON by myself an try my hardest to help him become a MAN... while his father runs around creating more an more kids an abandoning them b4 their even born... so if our president wants to take offense its his right... so those who take care of their kids shouldn't take offense... he is just speaking the truth... happy fathets day to all the single mothers no matter the race an to all the MEN taking care of their children no matter the situation...!

Joe, I do hear that some black men want to be in their children's lives and that some black women use the children as a pawn. The only problem I have is that everyone sees sex as something for enjoyment only. It is not!! Sex creates children and if you do it outside of marriage, men and women need to be ready to raise the children that may come out of it. We just don't seem to get that reality and RESPECT that reality the way other communities do! I'm sorry, we have got to do better. Way better.

The problem is much bigger than all this. Why does it have to be black or white. The issues are within all cultures. This world is so segregated still to this day. Stop trying to single yourselves out and look at the bigger picture.

I think what disturbs me is that there is any distinction between black fathers and white fathers or black families and white families. They're kids! Period. And they need good parents. That being said, people make mistakes. A good mom gets pregnant from a bad male. I don't necessarily think her baby is better off with a loser deadbeat dad in his/her life just because two is better than one. We really need to encourage birth control and educate women on being more selective about who they let be the father of their children.

My therapist used to say, "Father's what you did. Dad is what you do.". We need more fathers willing and able to be dads. I don't care if they're black, white, or green.

I understand the pain but on the real side most black women who are married had no dad in there household either which I have experience that they don't know how to see and treat a good husband and man of God. Let's keep it real on this. A hurting husband and father of 14 years of marriage. Peace God blessing.

I agree with the president which is very rare. The black community do need to step it up. It is a shame at how this thing has become a norm among us. There is something extremely wrong with in our community when you see our men and boys in prison or cracked and our women and girls engaged in prostitution and in jails and prisons as well. So yes what better time than on Father's day to send out a step it up speech? After all this is the time when all of the MIA and AWOL fathers suddenlly remember theyhave

Children

Sean,
Controversy: Have you ever thought that some black men are so attracted to white women because so many of those women had fathers who were there for them every single day? Look at Obama's daughters. They are beautiful inside and out and they have a dad their for them to teach them about self-esteem and how a man should treat a woman (Michelle). I know you and others will be shocked that I dared to say this but I know that 2-parent homes more often than not raise attractive, well-rounded women, no matter their race.

To the webmaster. You are an inconsiderate jerk. You should have people sign in before they can leave a comment so it does not get lost.

Why hasn't my comment been posted. What is goind on

Kent: Excellent point. Yes, I think the low rate of black fathers results in men AND women who bring issues into relationships.
Gotta go, folks! Celebrating Fathers Day with Dad!!!

I'll say it again.
I have served in the military for a long, long time; and been overseas 7 times for combat. I have worked with people of all races and people from many different countries. I was raised to respect an person that works hard, pays taxes, respects others and thinks of others more then themselves. I am Christian and have had Preachers of all colors. I believe good advice should be taken no matter what they look like. If a person has proven themselves it would be a good idea to listen to them. I am glad Obama has talked about this problem many times. If a white person had said those things that many of you agree with, that person would have been called racist.
I was special forces for 15 years, and all I could think about while at war was coming home to America, not many Americas. We all need to get over ourselves and become a one nation (hopefully under God) that simply call themselves Americans and work hard to make this a better place for our future children. It is going to take work, not give me, what about me, give me, I, I, I, me, me, me. I loved the military so much because of the team work from people all over the country and world. We worked together, so it can be done. The truth can hurt sometimes, but make changes to make ourselves better and better is a good thing.

Janita,

I can write a comment and press submit and then I get asked to sign or create an account and in that process the post gets lost and people like me and Steve lose the comment which will never be able to be recreated and is replaced with frustration. Who knows we may have had enlightening things to say about this issue but now we will never get to see them.

People that are hurt by what Obama said need to look deeper into themselves and see if they need to change. We think of ourselves to much insted of looking to see how our actions are hurting or helping others.
I do hope one day we can all work together and move forward.
It takes work for happiness.
God Bless

i find it remarkable that black men. are 100 percent to blame for there not being fathers not black women for choosing men that are irresponsible alot of times i e. hustlers, jailbirds. uneducated men. etc. i jus find it remarkable those kindof dudes got multiple kids all the time wit nuthing going for them. until black women pick the proper men like there white and hispanic counter parts the father issue will never go away. it will always be high . those dudes dont care wat obama says wat jesse jackson says wat al sharpton or anyone else. there gonna make babies and get pleasure from women. there not gonna tell a woman im not man enough to have sex wit u even tho, they kno there not. so its up to women to pick the rite men u hold all the cards

It is very difficult to provide for family or be there, when justice slaps u in the face. President Obama needs to restructure the justice system, from the police to the Judge. A lot of black women don,t want a felon to raise their child, even if he is the Dad. The justice system is incriminating black men, like its a game, destroying families. White Judges and prosecutors has convicted many wrongfully, DNA testing has proved that. So President if you are concerned, go to the root of the problem, don't be blind to the facts. Happy Father Day to the Dads that been there, but not @ home.

G Brown
Please look at the problem he was talking about. People of all colors have been wrongfully prosecuted, and people of all colors have been set free that should be in jail. People use the race card when that had nothing to do with it. And so on. I have seen many black men rewarded money because they somehow got hurt while robbing people. I have seen many white men get away with things. This is not a one sided thing. It is a good lawyer with no morals thing. The true issue is the American family has become a joke to the world. We have the highest divorce rate and the highest fatherless rate in the world. That is a problem.......
If we can't look at ourselves, insted of blaming all the time we will never grow and change into better people to make a better country

Why is it that we have learned to blame before we look at ourselves. I do beleive this is how we are teaching our kids. I saw on the news: A girl posted on facebook that she wished her teacher would have been killed by Bin Ladin. The teacher was a former military man and a war hero. She got 2 days suspension. Then on the news with the news on her side and her mother on her side. I would have gotten spanked everyday for a year. And most likely had to work for the teacher (mowing lawn, washing car, ect.) for free. This is what is going on. She got a bad grade and misbehaivs in class so the teacher did somthing about it. and then she wished him dead on facebook. Do we not understand that we need to punish our kids when they do wrong AND take responsibility when we mess up. NOT BLAME ANYTHING UNDER THE SUN TO MAKE OUR MISTAKES LOOK GOOD OR NOT OUR FAULT.

Instead of putting blame on black women, focus on your issue. We all know there are mothers put there, who are no good and horrible parents and that is their issue, but as MEN focus on your own issue and fix that. "My babymomma is a b****" is not a valid reason for not taking care of your kid. So what if she is, your kid has to suffer cuz u don't want to deal with her crap?? Understand, that I would walk through hell to see to mine, and NO ONE would be able to stop me. I know my husband loves me with all his heart, but I also know he would fight me tooth and nail, exhausting any & all resources if I told him he could never see these lil girls again. I know fathers, white and black who refused to give up and had to deal with more crap then u can imagine, but they dealt with it, got multiple jobs to pay for lawyers and did whatever they needed to see those kids. Its cowardly to walk away cuz the mother is a jerk. You can't fix her, but you can fix you.

I would like to send a shout out to those under-recognized brothers who are being actively kept out of their children's lives. Folks love to talk about men who aren't spending the time they should with their kids, but there are more good fathers out there being blocked from their children than I think is generally realized.
I have been in a custody battle over my daughter for over a year now. Despite the fact that I have always spent much more time with her than her mother, her mother has been trying to minimize my time with her in custody. Her parents were divorced when she was a teenager, and her father only had every other weekend with her. "and that worked out just fine" That is what's "normal" to her. Her reality makes a father who wants to spend as much time with his daughter as possible seem totally out of line.
I thank God for President Obama and others who recognize that a father is an integral part of the development of his child. Father's are not casual options or conveniences. Fathers are the halves that make their children whole. They show their daughters what the unconditional love of a man looks like. They show their sons that being a man is something entirely different than is being so broadly portrayed in modern culture
I wish that more men would come to understand how vitally important it is to their children and themselves for them to be involved. And I wish more women would expect and encourage this involvement

I have no problem at all with "fathers" being called out for not being true fathers to their children. The only thing I have an issue with is the increased use of Father's Day, especially in our community, to focus on the negative. Father's Day is the one day out of the year that we choose to universally honor our fathers; so, for the dialogue surrounding this one holiday, I'd prefer to see a focus on the positive.

No matter the view, GREAT comments from every here. Also, I personally think we need to reform the justice system because it simply is causing too many long-term, systemic problems for our families. Ironically, Noah's Ark Walk for a Change (a prison-reform organization) is launching a 7-day walk today. New conference is 11 a.m. at the county jail, 901 Rice St. The 139-mile march begins at noon. See our stories in www.cascade.patch.com.

Obama only spoke on half of the truth. Yes, it is true that many African American men are not part of the family, but that is also the same for other races. Why is that? Why are these men not part of the nuclear family? And why is there a family to begin with? I think that we should focus on women and their self esteem. The selection process of who we procreate with is the issue. Instead of jumping into sexual relations as soon as you get the late night booty call....why not actually get to know the person? A persons self worth and personal integrity is the only way to change family values. This is not geared toward any race. It happens with every nationality, skin color, etc. The only thing that needs "change" is truly an inside job. However, if the government wishes to create more social welfare programs, get to the source. Teach women how to empower themselves

Okay, Single women raising girls with some help from father, is okay, But we as women, should take more pride in ourselves, because it's take a mother to give birth to a child and raise them with the help from family members, and the little help she gets from their dad and have them grow into fine young ladies with high school diplomas and college degrees and continues to go further in their career. With that being said, a dad is alright, but its take a real man to be a father, someone that's not afraid of responsibility, and knows his place on earth that God created for us to live on and enjoy everything that he placed on earth. So to all those wanna be dads/fathers, like myself and a lot of other single moms that can keep their head above their problem, even if dad/father is not in your childs life, know one thing we have a father in Heaven, and he dont sleep and in ours lives thats only FATHER we need.

REBUILD THE VILLAGE
by: David W. Johnson, Jr.

Murderers attending colleges with our children
Murderers walking in our schools off the streets
Just what is it going to take for us to start caring?
Children’s lives are at stake, forget being discreet

Parents get up and walk your children to school
Mothers instead of birth control, parental control
Thanks to not caring, neighborhoods are cesspools
Neighborhoods and our children, we best get a hold

Stop waiting for the police to bring law and order
Live the way we should, police would be elsewhere
Adults are the reason children’s lives are in disorder
What we are doing to our children is beyond unfair

Get children from in front of the televisions, please
To know their future they must first know their past
Watching 53 MTV is not the road to college degrees
52 VH1 is taking them down the wrong road fast

Adults lift you heads and open your eyes to reality
Reality is, our children are gasping for breaths of life
To get it, adults we must develop a better mentality
Come together; take our children from the lowlifes

Show children Black Museums and the Smithsonian
Our children do not know or care about their history
Baltimoreans why should you dislike Washingtonians
Until we stop hating and killing we will never be free

For our children let us start to, “Rebuild The Village”

And JUST one more thing if you will allow//

And no disrespect or distain is intended for the OFFICE of our GREAT PRESIDENCY and White House.

Respect and honor and a great varity of reasons hold the United States Presidency in our Prayers and hopes for continued blessing and truthfull success.

BUT the truth is STILL THE TRUTH .

oBOMA does what he has to do~~~ just to get by.

Feeding his donors and supporters Un merited fuel, is HIS only OBJECTIVE.

this is HIS main OBJECTIVE.

The only REASON things get done, is because the people who SURROUND oBOMA, Drape the

American Flag around him, WHILE HE shoves it off of himself, in disheveled pride. and NUMB ignorance.

While, He admits, Boldly and sneeringly, he has done plenty of COCAINE.

Please Use your head and tell us, BECAUSE we need and deserve to know...

Why would we want a NUMB cacK heaD in the White House.

oBOMA should have stayed *( WHERE HE WAS ) ~ in the cracK house. !

PLEASE go to reXes NEW WebsiTe ~ ! Oboma *( Just like Adolf Hitler~~ In that oBOMA~~~ Demands ! -- [ THE FINAL SOLUTION - ~ For Un~Wanted Children

Barak Obama A MURDERER .~Torturing UNWANTED babys on DEATH ROE

http://obomanationinfanticide.sharepoint.com/Pages/default.aspx

OBAMA supports TAKING a little NEW BORN innocent child.. / BORN. ALIVE ~

sTabing it iN the head & SUCKs ITS BRAINS OUT.

He also demands, that a Child SURVIVING a FAILED ABORTION, Has no RIGHT to Life or medical care.

ReX,
Instead of focusing on what he has or hasn't done, why not look at our own lives and determined what we have done. One thing for sure: He is committed to his wife and children. If you want to conjure in your head that, somehow, he is not, fine. But happy, well-adjusted children are all the evidence you need of two good parents doing what they should be doing.

Oboma has NOT brought CHANGE, In fact ~~ THE ONLY real THING needing CHANGE !

Was Barack Hussein Obama II.

Barack Hussein Obama II ( Who hates American Values )

Who who is A " SELF PROCLAIMED Enemy " ~ of responsible, Morally Conscious HARD WORKING Americans.

oBOMAS supporters KNOW~ that Barack Hussein Obama II, WILL FORCE YOU to paY THEM, out of your PockeT ....

This UN~CHANGABLE fraud, has done His VERY BEST to Inspire VIOLENCE.

THESE ARE OBAMAS OWN WORDS.. saying “Bring it on” To his supporters.

Oboma ~ Demands Saying “Get ready for hand-to-hand combat with your fellow Americans”

– Obama has ALSO DECLARED to his Supporters

“I want all Americans to get in each others faces!–

Obama demands !

“You bring a knife to a fight pal, we’ll bring a gun” – Obama Cant wait to get everybody involved in some kind OF CONFRONTATION of some sort....

THESE ARE OBAMAS OWN WORDS..

Obama has ALSO DECLARED "Republicans are our enemies"-

** Obama on ACORN Mobs: “I don’t want to quell anger. I think people are right to be angry! I’m angry!”

ANGER VIOLENCE and more taxes..... THIS IS OBAMAS Change for america

/“Hit Back Twice As Hard”. He commands !

THESE ARE OBAMAS Very OWN WORDS..

*Obama on the private sector: ~~ “We talk to these folks…~ / so I know whose ass to KICK.“
OBOMA wants to KICK your ass /

Shouting THAT Republican victory would mean ~ “hand to hand combat”

HE IS EXPECTING people to kill & BE VIOLENT / for their immoral CAUSES

THIS IS WHAT HE LIVES FOR
THESE ARE OBAMAS OWN WORDS..
* Obama Tells democrats: “ I’m itching for a fight.” !